Partially Painted

hhaaha, oh wait you are being serious... that is actually even wosre.

2008-06-12T22:50:00.000-07:00

telling a nosy reporter to fuck off

2008-06-11T00:13:00.000-07:00

2008-06-10T22:39:00.001-07:00

Whom mischievous speaking, drew?
Turning embarrassed, steps explain,
and allows yours the night's studied news?
Here at least few allowed friends
find a development.

2008-06-10T22:35:00.000-07:00

the yad

2008-06-09T21:50:00.001-07:00

last night i went out to a club in san francisco. after about fifteen minutes, a 21-23 year old girl from sacramento tried to get me to dance to a new order mashup with her. i smoked one of her american spirit cigarettes and told her that i couldn't because my ankle was a little swollen, which is kind of an in-joke for me. she looked me over for a moment and conferred in hushed tones with her fat friend, who i noticed had a number of crosshatched scars on her arms. they looked self-inflicted and fairly new. she then asked me where a good bar was, someplace non-touristy. i told them i just moved here on tuesday and that she should ask my friend j., who at the time was embroiled in an animated (but not aggressive) conversation with a emigré from st. james, something about the appropriate price for a 32-footer in bad condition. she thanked me and the two of them awkwardly left.

2008-06-06T12:34:00.000-07:00

terrible cliche #74

"What happened?"
"Life happened."

trip report : la belle noiseuse

2008-06-06T12:25:00.000-07:00

brilliant

damned

2008-06-05T15:07:00.000-07:00

N'attendez pas le Jugement dernier. Il a lieu tous les jours.

2008-06-05T12:40:00.000-07:00

worse

2008-06-05T12:35:00.000-07:00

Horrible Accident

2008-06-05T00:50:00.001-07:00

2008-06-05T00:03:00.001-07:00

Having a Coke With You
is even more fun than going to San Sebastian, Irún, Hendaye, Biarritz, Bayonne
or being sick to my stomach on the Travesera de Gracia in Barcelona
partly because in your orange shirt you look like a better happier St. Sebastian
partly because of my love for you, partly because of your love for yoghurt
partly because of the fluoresent orange tulips around the birches
partly because of the secrecy our smiles take on before people and statuary

it is hard to believe when I'm with you that there can be anything as still
as solemn as unpleasantly definitive as statuary when right in front of it
in the warm New York 4 o'clock light we are drifting back and forth
between each other like a tree breathing through its spectacles
and the portrait show seems to have no faces in it at all, just paint
you suddenly wonder why in the world anyone ever did them
I look
at you and I would rather look at you than all the portraits in the world
except possibly for the Polish Rider occasionally and anyway it's in the Frick
which thank heavens you haven't gone to yet so we can go together the first time
and the fact that you move so beautifully more or less takes care of Futurism
just as at home I never think of the Nude Descending a Staircase or
at a rehearsal a single drawing of Leonardo or Michelangelo that used to wow me
and what good does all the research of the Impressionists do them
when they never got the right person to stand near the tree when the sun sank
or for that matter Marino Marini when he didn't pick the rider as carefully
as the horse
it seems they were all cheated of some marvellous experience
which is not going to go wasted on me which is why I am telling you about it

(Frank O'Hara, 1960)

2008-06-04T18:11:00.001-07:00

Les comédiens
Ont installé leur tréteau
Ils ont dressé leur estrade
Et tendu des calicots
Les comédiens
Ont parcouru les faubourgs
Ils ont donné la parade
A grands renforts de tambours

Devant l'église,
Une roulotte peinte en vert
Avec les chaises
D'un theâtre à ciel ouvert
Et derrière eux
Comme un cortège en folie
Ils drainent tout le pays
Les comédiens

rip ysl

2008-06-02T17:52:00.000-07:00

I have known fear and the terrors of solitude.

Whereupon Jesse Takes A Shower

2008-06-02T01:30:00.000-07:00

I sloped forward into my chair, spinning midair just before hitting the seat to make sure I was sitting in it instead of dragging my face across the backrest. I sat comfortably for a moment, relaxed. After a few minutes, I was suddenly self aware, in a bad way. I needed to take a shower. I relaxed further before getting up to get undressed and bathe. Once I was in the shower, I realized that my hair was exceptionally dirty and that I may need to wash it more than once. At this point I entered a state of temporary shower blindness for about four minutes as I applied copious amounts of shampoo to my head. Due to the varying water pressure in the shower I happened to be using, I would sometimes feel as though I had been under the stream long enough for the shampoo to be out of my hair and open my eyes, when in reality the shampoo was still making its way over my eyelids. It is these few strange moments when one closes one’s eyes completely that I often feel a sense of pride over the masterful control I have of my body. I am able to do many very complex tasks in relation to showering even with my eyes closed, and I feel very good about that.

A Bird In My House

2008-06-02T01:24:00.000-07:00

What is that bird I know that sings,
Of longing, heartache, and sadder things,
The bird will sing this song to me,
If I am distant from its tree.

The bird, I think, is mostly black,
In plume of breast and on the back.
The feathers, though, around the face,
Are soft and white, and full of grace.

And on return from any trip?
The bird, it hops and does a flip!
A worm it gives to me, as well,
A present, if you couldn’t tell.

But not the nest, may I approach,
Or else the bird will gasp and choke.
And hold its wing up to its head,
And then pretend to fall down, dead.

2008-06-01T21:17:00.001-07:00

Hillary Diane Rodham Clinton (ヒッラリ　ダイアン　ロッダム　クリントン, Hirrari Daian Roddamu Kurinton) is the junior United States Senator from New York, and a candidate for the Democratic nomination in the 2008 presidential election.

2008-06-01T20:19:00.000-07:00


	the answer is testosterone. the other chem tattoo i have is serotonin to let others know that my depression not a character flaw; rather a pre determined genetic trait and that their oh so happy world of bunny rabbits is held together by nothing more than a couple of hyrogen bonds. on my dick i have a 5 card poker hand of 9JQKA to signify the one missing piece that is a ten inch dick

bikini a poll ? i hardly know her..

2008-06-01T01:41:00.000-07:00

We need a tag line for this kewl blog: my humble suggestions

Crapitalism sucks. Now Listen to my song: Liberté, égalité, fraternité
its awesome when the cum mixes with runny mascara at the end
i hear the mathematician dating your mom really did a number on her face!

quack

2008-06-01T01:32:00.000-07:00

Brain clouds come now
and solid in my brain
electricity swells
It bills us it swallows us whole it rolls and shakes and vibrates rotor clouds pummel my awareness and I am a hand inside a cloud, the very hairs of my skin are stalks of wheat in heavy wind rolling, shaking,
birds in the air fly unnaturally
when primal beats begin to decimate their sanity
birds cannot handle rhythm
their nervous system rejects it
no rapper was ever a bird
and if one was, i wouldnt listen to that shit

aha

2008-06-01T01:18:00.000-07:00

Wet sand and elephants
trumpet from within
and squinting worthless pedestrians amble past
and look through the slots on the fence
but all they see through the dust

spines and words splitting
vowels splatter wet on the floor,
muffled drum beats while
doors and bookshelves open wide and splinter
wired young men flit in the book fire
and stare upward
the celling shatters when the rotor dislocates

the the miserable firemen
pull the scrambled from the surf
and there in the corner
the elephant
bisected by a propeller painted with teeth

2008-06-01T00:26:00.001-07:00

hapy june day everybody!!!

2008-06-01T00:17:00.000-07:00

i got the blues

2008-05-28T14:21:00.000-07:00

Banjo toting bluegrassman

2008-05-28T14:07:00.000-07:00

2008-05-28T14:05:00.000-07:00

Every great and original writer, in proportion as he is great and original, must himself create the taste by which he is to be relished.

Square

2008-05-27T10:28:00.000-07:00

What is it about a cigarette? It's obviously not the taste, not to any sane person anyway. A good occupation of time, something to do with your hands. It creates an image of order among chaos, letting the smoke slip slowly out, a constant motion in comparison to the relative stillness of the body. It is destructive and soothing, satisfying an urge for flame, offering its own release, glad to be burned. The slow decay between my fingers offers control, even if fleeting and ultimately meaningless, control just the same. A moment of power. The combination of life and death is appealing, living on the verge, almost. The drawing breath fills the lungs with the air they need and the smoke they want, a tiny death each time. Each exhale is both healing and defensive. It satisfies also an urge for struggle, although a slight one. It helps.

Desert

2008-05-27T08:57:00.000-07:00

Everything is a white-gray color, and endless expanse of dreary predictability. A kind of endless rain falls from the white above, fading imperceptibly into the gray of below. No features, no people, only white-gray and damp. This place, this lonely place, am I to wander it forever?

-Ideal-

2008-05-25T23:53:00.000-07:00

A person, long in his repetitions and waiting
will not feel the time as though it flows,
but as he feels the slow ascent from sleep.
But once a sentence has been served,
no longer must one wait, unnerved.

When one may sit and have the time wished for,
the roils ought match
the shape of that long, smooth curve.
As a compliment, to add another.

If only the fruit without the effort,
but no,
what would be the lesson learned?
Or where the process is concerned
a lack of one completely,
which leaves one still with a longing for something more.

There are no ways to say aloud
the things behind the eyes of one.
A thought is always original, if it comes to you suddenly,
Even if it's been done, it has yet to be done by you.
But before claiming any for oneself,
First show good to that one known best.

2008-05-25T18:35:00.001-07:00

"As soon as we put something into words, we devalue it in a strange way. We think we have plunged into the depths of the abyss, and when we return to the surface the drop of water on our pale fingertips no longer resembles the sea from which it comes. We delude ourselves that we have discovered a wonderful treasure trove, and when we return to the light of day we find that we have brought back only false stones and shards of glass; and yet the treasure goes on glimmering in the dark, unaltered."
- Maurice Maeterlinck

2008-05-25T09:51:00.001-07:00

Movies i watched yesterday

Paranoid Park by Gus Van Sant

This is a movie about skateboarders, some bad shit happens to one, maybe, and he writes about it, he learns a valuable lesson about the perils of hopping trains and being a general fag, his gf is hot too but he dumps her cuz he's a faggot etc. I learned a lot from this movie. It has a cool soundtrack also.

OSS 117OSS117 is a secret agent from France, the movie is like a connery bond film combined w/ obvious and Aha sex puns, chickens, arabs, making fun of arabs in a satirical way, hot chicks, vague homoeroticism. Pretty cool, I learned how to say both Weiner in french and Thank you in arabic.

2008-05-25T09:29:00.000-07:00

There are bottles and a fan in my room and they taunt me as the temperatures begin to ceaselessly rise. I sit motionless because my body aches from the heat. My eyes close, and for a few seconds I try to imagine being in Bermuda, or Berrings, and then there is a wetness suddenly, my hair is soaked, and it pools onto my face. Soon enough, my face begins to drip as well. My hands, writing, become fluid and inattentive, as they search for integrity, they find none and puddle on my notebook. I am a slowly dissolving man. Any move I make seems to hasten the now inevitable appearing liquification I have somehow been chosen to endure. I fall out of my chair, I fall into and wet the carpet. I drip, I drip, I drip, I am absorbed by the carpet, absorbed by the plywood and lumber underneath. I begin, as I must, my new occupation : the eternal rot and disintegration of an old house.

2008-05-25T00:53:00.000-07:00

2008-05-25T00:10:00.001-07:00

A hand well designed for writing,
its precise sinews and
microscopic
nerves allow the specific action- the pen, the guitar,
My hand on paper
is nostalgia. This is simple. The head, the hand, is the feature that touched God
and is therefore, Great.

A man is in a room,
he gets thwacked,
gets amnesia,
gets woken up.
In some place, unkown to him,
he can only remember a partial scrap
of paper.
Reading it, he "Wheel of Fortune,"

In a deeply meloncholic way, reads aloud, to his dear friend, :

"I remember everything and nothing, All is nothing, I am nothing and all, I can see myself, my worthless pities and misfortunes, what a life have I, Woe, the darkest of Woe, may it pass onto my friends and enemies, such that they discover what misfortunes I have invented."

The friend, immediately comments " Fuck yeself ............

-Free Medical Advice-

2008-05-24T23:30:00.000-07:00

While I in no way claim to be an expert in the areas, I have done my fair share of dabbling in the practices of Femopshychology. Thus I offer for your benefit the fruits of my experiences as I have observed them. I can only hope such information will be of use to you at some point or another. ‡ JB, PhD

-℞ and Diagnosis For [Happiness Induced Sadness] or HIS Syndrome-

Love cannot be a condition brought about because of certain traits, but a condition allowed to exist in spite of them. When you find that person you want to be with, an easily made yet fatal mistake can occur; idealization. It is tempting to assign only positive characteristics to the person you care for, and equally tempting to overlook all of the negative ones that may actually exist. If you cannot accept that this person has some flaws of their own, then you may begin to see everything as your own fault, a viewpoint which has some very negative side effects. If one can keep an open mind in the sense that just because you love someone doesn't make them perfect, then one should be able to avoid the depressive pitfalls indicative of self-abhorrence.

Diagnosis: If you are having any of the following symptoms, consult trusted friends immediately:

Sudden Confusion of Fault

Growing Annoyances

Needless Feelings of Culpability

Sense of Impending Panic

Prescription: Do not worry, these things are all normal in small amounts, and the presence of one or all does not necessarily indicate the presence of a disorder. It is only when these symptoms become an obstacle to general, everyday happiness on a chronic basis that a problem might exist. If you believe you may currently be having this problem, please take the following actions:

Relax

Take a Deep Breath

Make a List of Grievances

Make a List of Flatteries

Compare the Lists

If one list is found to be excessively longer than the other, act accordingly either way.